Tuesday, June 22, 2010

silly little fight

so me and lee got into a little fight on sunday. We were sitting watching tv and the daily show was on. Jon stewart was talking about gay rights and all that stuff. so we got to talking and lee was very much in support of the gay community and equal rights and all that. and i agreed with him about everything. Its just im not big on "fighting the good fight". Like all these gay people getting mad about a small comment or someone using the word fag in the wrong way. I just want to stay at home with my boyfriend and be happy. But lee thinks that since im gay, i should get mad when people make fun of gay people. But like, i feel like i should be the bigger person and just ignore all the childishness going on in the outside world. Some people just dont like gay people. i hope that makes sense.

Anyway, we were debating the whole thing and lee was getting pretty upset, so as he got up to leave the room he took my french fries and threw them in the garbage. i was furious. so i yelled "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!!?!" and he just kept walking.
Now ill admit, i over reacted a tad about the french fries. But i think he over reacted about the whole gay thing. I was calm while we were debating, he was getting heated.

So since he was at my house, the rest of his visit was a little tense. he wasnt about to apologize and neither was i. we were both just angry. We didnt even sleep in the same bed.

So when he left the next day, i didnt want to be the one to call and apologize first, but that changed. Tuesday i just coundnt do it anymore so i called. We talked. He apologized and i apologized. we both realized how stupid of a fight it was. i mean, it really was just a stupid argument. I shouldnt have gotten so mad about french fries. and lee should understand that we have different views.

So in other news my mom and dad keep asking when im gettin a girlfriend. Its always so awkward. So i think they might be leaning something about me pretty soon.


  1. Yup, dumb argument. But I would have been pissed if somebody grabbed my fries and tossed them. I also would have gotten over it pretty fast.

    Just because you are together doesn't mean that you have to share the same views, and with the same intensity. And just because you identify as gay does mean that you automatically have to march in the gay pride parade, or protest marriage laws, or otherwise act up. Lee was wrong.

  2. Dan

    Life is about respect in a lot of ways not agreement. Like someone said u guys wil not agree on everything but try to understand why its important to him

    i wish u guys the best, i thought u were out to the folks too werent u?

    take care nad be safe


  3. the words are "give and take", dan :) don't lose a boy like lee over a silly fight like this okie? i'm happy that you decided to take the initiative to apologise. peace.

  4. I guess it all depends on who's 'ox is being gored'... The idea that you can just sit back, and tolerate hate speech as a gay man, is well... cowardly... If you tell your mom and dad that you're gay, and your dad calls you a ' dirty fag', how are you going to feel then?? Would that make you mad??
    I'm not saying that you should have had a meltdown over this with Lee... that doesn't help. But, where was he coming from?? Has he had a tougher time living in the closet, than you??
    Listen kid, maybe I won't make any friends saying this but, a man has to stand up for what is right. History is replete with horrible examples of the result of complacency...If you saw a little kid getting beat up, on the street, would you say something? Extreme example?? Well, how far is it between the common use of the word 'fag', and the result where gay kids are victimized because nobody spoke up?? That's the reality that Lee was probably steamed about....
    There's nothing silly or frivolous about standing for something... If we all did nothing- where would you be today?? If you want some history on that, google 'The Stonewall Riots'... maybe you'll be less complacent with a little look back, to see where your 'rights' really came from... luv, tman<3

  5. I totally agree with you. Some people don't like gay people and who am I to push my beliefs on them.

  6. I really like what my husband said to me when we were first dating:

    It's not give-and-take; it's give-and-give.

    If we have a tiff, we usually both apologize, almost immediately.

  7. Silly boys. :P

    Good that you sorted it out. (:

  8. Ah now I know tis true love! Because only people who are really in love care enough to fight about french fries!

    But really, you can keep from saying something, however once it's out of your mouth, you can never get it back. And words can really hurt! So, be mindful during your next wee tiff!

  9. I know this is a little late, but Im catching up.

    Personally, I am similar to you. I don't wear my sexual orientation on my sleeve. I dont have a problem with people that are really passionate and I guess Im glad someone is doing it, but I feel like it *shouldnt* be a big deal and Im not going to treat it like one. Me being gay/bi doesnt define me as a person-- its just a part of me, and I dont want to put out the energy. I have other things I care more about. But Im happy/proud for those that fight the good fight--its just not my fight.

    I agree with Bob-- relationships are more about respect than agreement on things like this. I would take note though that this is going to be a philosophical difference that will probably come up again and again. So just keep it in the back of your head. Prob better to "work it out" and get that mutual respect instead of just dont talk about it and think each other is wrong... but i mean no reason to have a serious conversation until necessary :-)

    lol french fries? was that like the only thing in reach? funny.

    Glad it all worked out-- and Im nervous for you for telling your parents... hope it goes well.

    Much Love,