Friday, December 10, 2010

christmas tears

so it finally decided to snow more than a centimeter last night. so when i woke up this morning and saw it all, i figured what a perfect time to listen to some christmas songs. so i grab my computer, open itunes and start playing all the christmas songs i have.....which is actually a lot. A few songs go by, and im just laying in bed listening and surfing the web when this song comes on......

.......and i start sobbing. literally crying like a baby. some nearly naked 19 year old gay kid laying in bed crying his eyes out over the christmas song. I cried the for the entire song. and im not really sure why. every christmas since i can remember, this song has been there. does this happen to anyone else? its the first time its ever happened. well except the first time i heard the schindlers list music after i first saw it.

also heres a question for my gay readers. lets say in the near future they come up with a cure for being gay. you would take a pill and boom, you would no longer find the same sex attractive, and suddenly the opposite sex looks fuckable. if they came out with a pill like that, would u take it? ill tell u my answer after i hear some of yours. incentive to comment.

in another note, im so fucking sick of being single. im tired of waking up in the morning and not seeing a boy laying next to me. its getting to be very frustrating. and it would be so nice to have a boyfriend for the holidays. we could listen to christmas music, drink hot chocolate, cuddle up by the fire. i guess im not so lucky.

anyway, today feels like a lazy one. better get started.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010


comments have been lacking. not loving that. it really doesnt help me want to write anything when i think people dont read it. if theres one thing a blog needs to remain healthy, its comments.

you all should comment more.

Monday, November 29, 2010

a bunch of shit

u ever wake up really really horny? like, unbelievably horny? happened to me this morning. my god. i woke up and just all i wanted to do was get my nut off. i kept grinding into my bed. haha must have looked kinda funny.

every time im at work i see josh. and
every time i see josh, he just gets more and more cute. like, wtf. why cant he be gay? fuck. i really wanna see him naked.

so me and lee are no longer dating. he actually called me. left me a voice mail. "we need to talk"
so i called him and he was like "i think we should break up" and i was like "i agree". after we talked for a few minutes and ended our call, i kinda got sad. like, i really loved lee for a while, and to just ended it like that. idk. he deserved a better boyfriend.

any one try the new french fries at wendys? when i first heard about the change, i was furious. i fucking loved wendys french fries. but i gotta say, damn. the new ones are better. they kept the same taste, but changed the.......something. im not sure what they did, but im pleased.

its a really great day out today. just beautiful. it worries me tho. this could be the last nice day. and when there are no more nice days it snows, which means no more rain. i love the rain. its so calming. and when its over and the sun peaks through....o man. but snow is fun for a while. i just hate the cold.

kinda random post. have a pic tho.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Very curious...

So at work there's this kid named Josh. I think he likes me.

Like I barely know the kid and he talks to me like we've known each other for years. He calls me Dan the man, and a few days ago hd even gave me his peanut butter and jelly sandwich, which was delicious by the way.

So yea I think he might. And I'm ok with it. I keep trying to be all cool and slick around him, but it really doesn't matter. Like, if he likes me and tells me, sure, let's fuck. But if it's all in my head, whatevs.

He's also not the best looking guy but hes kinda cute. He fuckable.
Omg I'm horrible.

so hes not gay just really friendly. we were at work and he said he had to drive 2 hours, so i asked him why. "to see my girlfriend".

damn. i didnt think id be pissed but i kinda am. he looked really cute today. he didnt put gell in his hair and it looked so much better. i was undressing him with my eyes all day. damn.

Also this is my 200th post? damn i wish i had something prepared. hows a quick pic of my hip? im in bed.

Sunday, November 7, 2010


so ive got a crush. a huge one.

theres this boy. ive never talked to him. ive never seen him in real life. i only really know what he decides to share on the internet. hes been in my dreams. i think about him a lot.

i have a huge crush on this boy.

and it feels wonderful.

i havent felt this way in a long time. i never really felt this way about lee. lee just...happened.

but the one thing that is kinda fucking with my head is that this boy is a lot like lee. like, almost the same thing. looks a lot like lee and everything. but idk.

idk. its nuts. im nuts. but all i know is i feel wonderful.

Thursday, November 4, 2010


lees fine. hes just miles away. its hard being in a relationship when you never see the other person.

and idk. i might be over lee. i know that sounds bad, but idk. i feel like i want something more. something more that he cant give me.

When i met lee, he was the perfect boy. A timid, shy boy who just wanted someone to hold him. And when we started dating, it was perfect. I got to be his knight in shining armor. i was the man of the relationship. it was great. but then i lost it. Something happened when school started that really got to me. I felt this huge feeling of regret and remorse. I felt worthless. I would look at my life and see nothing at all i wanted. There are so many things i wish i would have done differently. i wish i would have stayed on the football team. I wish i would have tried harder in school. I wish i would have accepted my gayness at an earlier age. It was like this huge weight was on my shoulders. i couldnt sleep. i couldnt eat. i lost almost 20 lbs. i was miserable. I kept thinking about how easy it would be to just kill myself. then i wouldnt have to be so miserable all the time. So i decided to change my life. I left school, came home, got a job, and will soon be transfering to a better school where i will get a better degree and then a better job.....hopefully.

and now im basically all better. no more bouts of depression.

but along with my meltdown came a new thirst for boys. im done with the wimpy, girly, shy boys. I want a man. I want to be the shy one. I want to be the timid one. i want a knight in shinning armor. Ive always felt like a gay boy stuck in a straight boys life. i want out. i wanna be the gay boy stuck in a gay boys life.

Im tired of fucking. i just wanna get fucked.

p.s. matts right. its hard to find the desire to write a post when comments are so few and far between. lets go people. I WANT TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS!!!!!!

anyway, hope to see u all on msn soon. ive been on the past 3 nights, but no ones on.

Friday, October 29, 2010

let me explain


yes. im still alive.

so since its been over a month since my last post, i thought i owed everyone an explanation. Right around the time when i was kinda having a mental breakdown, i completely lost any desire to write a post. Nothing was going on that i wanted to share. and after a while it felt good. it felt good to not have to worry about this world and to just worry about my real world. my future and all that.

but now im back for good. writing this feels wonderful. im back.

so anyway, i have a job. and its a pretty nice job. everyone is really nice and there are some smokin boys. Aaron, who is this blonde slim boy with earrings in both ears and a tight little ass. god hes wonderful. and this boy james who is cute as fuck and might be gay. and recently(last night) this boy josh who was really flirting hard man. i could feel it.

so yeah thats about it. i guess ill keep up working until next semester and then go to school around her. yeah that sounds good.

and if anyone has any questions about anything, or if theres anything at all your dying to know, just ask. ill answer anything.

love u all. bye.

Friday, September 17, 2010


so im sorry about the long absence. Ive been taking a break from blog world. and im not gonna lie, its been pretty nice.

but now im back.

So after having what i like to call a mini mental breakdown, im back to feeling like my old self, if not better. I dropped out of school and am taking the semester off. i got a job. and i didnt break up with lee.

so all in all im all better.

maybe one day in the future ill post the whole story, but for right now i just wanted u all to know im not dead.

also, for some stupid reason, msn deleted my email account, which means i have to use a new email for msn. so everyone who i normally talk to.....


we can talk and laugh and not give a mother of fuck. itll be wonderful. =)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

not doing well

im like in a bad place.

my head is full of self doubt and worry about my future. ive lost 13 lbs in like, a week. im considering ending it with lee. and on top of that, its looking like im taking a semester off from school.

i just dont know whats going on with me. im depressed all the time. im just overwhelmed.

i think im going to seek professional help. maybe see someone to help me out.

id love to talk to anyone who has any advise or just wants to talk.



Saturday, September 4, 2010

bored. so heres this.

1. what are you listening to?
Southernplayalisticadillacmuzik by outkast. the tits.

2. what was the last album you obtained?
2001 by dr dre and snoop dog

3. what are you wearing?
dark blue basketball short and a purple zip up hoodie with no shirt underneath

4. what's for dinner or what was for dinner?
dinner last night was ribs at chilis. tonight, who knows.

5. when is last time you saw your mom?
3 hours ago in the kitchen

6. what do you put on your toast?
depends. it could be butter, jelly, jam, peanut butter. whatevs.

7. what time is it?
11:13 am

8. what do you wear to bed?
i used to wear shorts and a tshirt, but now i just wear shorts.

9. what do you smell?
grape soda

10. what's on your coffee table or nearest table?
my phone, alarm clock, ipod, socks, lamp, gummy worms.

11. do you use conditioner?
i do

12. do you floss?
before i go to the dentist

13. do you use energy saving light bulbs?
my parents buy them

14. how old is your computer?
2 years? around there

15. how do you take your coffee?
like i take my men. full of cream.

16. what is your favorite beverage?
cocacola. there is nothing like a cold glass od coke.

17. what's the last piece of clothing you bought?
purple zip up hoodie

18. now, what are you listening to?
juicy by the notorious b.i.g.

19. What is the last beverage you drank?

20. Who was the last person to send you a text message?
lee like 15 mins ago

21. Are you happy?

22. Where was the last place you went shopping?

23. Where did u go today?

24. YM or MSN?

25. Who was the last person to call you?

26. What’s your zodiac sign?

Thursday, September 2, 2010

i suck

im getting pretty bad at this blog shit. i apologize. ive just been in an extremely lazy mood. once school starts im sure ill start posting more.

again, im really sorry.

heres a cute boy

Thursday, August 26, 2010

hello again

IM HOME!!!! actually ive been home for over a week. After spending a week with the same people, when i got home i just didnt want to deal with anything. so i didnt blog, didnt go on msn, barely tweeted. it was a nice little break. but now im back!

so my trip was pretty awesome. California is amazing. the weather is gorgeous. We went to universal studios, disney land, the san diego zoo, hollywood. It was awesome. And flying was really a piece of cake.

there were billions of cute boys. it was ridiculous. its like they have them in bulk over there. I fantasized about so many boys. it was pretty awesome.

got home and just chilled with friends. didnt see lee till tuesday. aaron was really getting on my nerves on monday. im most definitely over him. but damn, im still very sexually attracted to him. hes so sexy to me.

and whats weird is, during my trip, i really didnt miss lee. i feel like i missed my dog more than i missed lee. and when i got home i was just like meh. i didnt really care if i saw him or didnt. but the minute he got here i ripped his clothes off and had my way with him. its like after not seeing him for over a week and then finally having him in front of me, it like reminded me that i can do anything i want to this boy. so i did. amazing.

school starts in a little less than 2 weeks. im ready to go back. so is lee.

so yeah just a nice little update. i didnt really go into great detail, so if anyone has any questions about anything, please ask. ill answer asap.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010


so im off to california! ill be gone a week so you probably wont hear from me till then.

sorry i havent been posting as much. busy i am.

Cya in a week!!!


Monday, August 2, 2010


ive been kinda down in the dumps lately. ive just been thinking to much.

summers over in a month and then im back off to school. it went by way to fast. what did i manage to accomplish? nothing. i didnt get a job. i just sat around being lazy. i literally was the most insignificant thing on the earth. i didnt contribute to society at all. im just a bum. a lazy fucking bum with no prospects at all. my future is doomed. im going to end up bagging groceries for the rest of my life.

im surrounded by all these people who love me. my friends, family, lee. but for some reason i feel so fucking alone. i feel like i have no one who i can really talk to about things. i can only tell you guys certain things. i can only tell my friends certain things. i can only tell lee certain things. i need someone who i can tell everything to. im tired of living so many different lives. its killing me.

i just want to cry.

Friday, July 30, 2010


i miss lee. like bad. i dont get it. like the second he left, i immediately wanted him back. everything i do is better with him. eating, sleeping, walking, burping, jerking off. he makes everything so much more enjoyable.

and im scared. i never thought i could ever be this into another person. i know i wanted to with aaron, but now that its with lee, its scary.

is lee the one i want to spend the rest of my life with? as of right now, yeah.

idk maybe im just fucked up this week.

Monday, July 19, 2010

a weekend to remember (im running out of titles)

so i left for lees on friday. got there and we just hung out for a while until like 4, when we heard talking coming from downstairs. So we walk down and lees mom and dad are sitting at the table with a young woman and some dude. The woman got up and her and lee hugged. Lee was pretty excited. He introduced me, as his boyfriend, to his sister melanie, and his sisters husband bill. we all sat down and immeditly i fell in love with her. shes awesome. she kept making gay jokes that were hilarious. me and lee were laughing but lees parents were like "oh my". bill was off on the phone somewhere for a while. i guess hes a real estate agent in chicago. idk.

anyway we all talk for a while and we order a pizza and lee, melanie, bill and i all played monopoly. Bill was pretty cool. he played football in highschool so we talked for a while about that. not bad looking either. the night wound down and me and lee went off to bed.

the next day i didnt wake up till 1230. lee made me some toast and we got dressed and went downtown. we were down there for a long ass time. we were just walking around. we ran into a few of lees friends. i will never get tired of hearing lee introduce me as his boyfriend. got back late and passed out.

next day me and lee just sat for a while. played some xbox and all that. dinner time was coming up and i was invited to join lees parents, melanie and bill out to olive garden. i of corse said yes. so we get there and our waiter comes over and is absolutely gorgeous. just a really cute guy. so he takes out drink order and right when he leaves melanie says "wow you two. your mouths must be watering." lee turned red and i burst out laughing. lees mom shot a dirty look at melanie. pretty good dinner.

next day, or this morning, i left early so i could say goodbye to my dad before he left for some conference in washington.

so yeah pretty nice trip to lees. i really do love him. fuck aaron. he missed out.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

ass so nice, had to look twice

so last weekend my friend john invited me up to his lake house to go boating and all that fun stuff. He also invited my friends sam, bob, and............aaron, who was home for the weekend.

So we get there and change into our swim suits and immediately my eyes are fixated on aaron. my god. gorgeous. his once bare chest had a little wisp of hair. and his ass. that juicy succulent ass. what i wouldnt do to dive dick deep into that perfectly molded boy butt. no offense to lee, but aaron has a much nicer butt. So i basically spent the entire day staring at him, which i could do because lee wasnt there and i had those sunglasses where u cant see what the person is looking at.

So it was a pretty great day. when i got home i started thinking about what would happen if aaron called me up and was like "i made a mistake. i love u. lets fuck." like, what would i do? i dont like the idea of me just leaving lee the minute aaron says i wanna fuck u. u know? thats not good. But like, aaron is aaron. i feel like i would have an extremely hard time turning him down. I have a boyfriend who i love and would do anything for, but would i turn aaron away? idk. and i hate myself for not knowing. good thing it will never happen tho.

and about my mom. she didnt say "i know u fuck lee in the basement." what happened was my dad said to me and my brother, "find a woman just like her" and my mom said "or a man"
at which point i kinda turned and left. awkward.

anyway, off to lees tomorrow. i need to get out of this house.

Friday, July 9, 2010

deep stuff

so lee stayed over for a while this week and on wednesday lee said something that made me think about our future together. We were at the mall in sears walking past the washing machines when lee stopped.

lee: do u think were gonna be able to afford a nice washing machine when were married?
me: uhhhhhh......i.....hope?

i was pretty surprised. i really didnt know how to answer. so later when we got back to my place, i asked him about it.

me: so, we're getting married?
lee: huh?
me: u said earlier in the mall we were getting married and buying nice washing machines
lee: o yeah. idk i just kinda said it. have u never thought about it?
me: about us getting married?
lee: yeah
me: not really no
lee: oh. well i was thinking about it a few days ago.
me: and?
lee: well i really like u obviously and i feel like we really connect. Like, i think we should move in together next year.
me: damn.
lee: sorry. forget i said anything.
me: no no dont be sorry. its just ive never really thought about this before. its all pretty new thinking.
lee: i understand. will u think about it? its only the seed on an idea.
me: ill definitely think about it.

so heres me thinking about it.

i love lee. i would love nothing more than to be with him all day everyday. but moving in together is huge. marriage is huge. now if we have an argument, we have our own houses to cool off at. like, i can leave and he can leave. but once we move in together, we are always together. i also feel like once we move in together, thats it. im locked into this relationship. which is fine i guess. idk.

not sure what to do.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

too many cuties

jesus. a lot of shits been going on. here it all is. Oh and happy fourth of july.

Wednesday: i was home alone and i was bored out of my skull. I figured id call up a friend. So i called my friend jacob. He said he was busy with another friend but that they could both stop over. i said sure. So jacob and his friend mike come over. And ive met mike a few times. Let me just tell ya, pretty fucking cute. Hes a year younger than me and jacob. so we end up hanging out all day and into the night. Eventually, mike falls asleep.....on my bed. So there was a very cute boy on my bed, and it wasnt lee.
but i wasnt on the bed with him, and i eventually told jacob to take him home. Pretty fun day tho.

thursday: Got a call from jacob saying mike wanted to hang out again, so i said hell yes. They show up at 7 and mike brought one of his friends will, who i have never met. Once again, another fucking cutie. So we chill, and this time will was the one to fall asleep in my bed. I dont know why everyone just goes to my bed. It is very comfortable. So i had two cute boys in my room. no lee.

Friday: Me and a bunch of friends were gonna have a little get together at my house. My friend john asked if it would be cool if he brought a friend from college. I said of corse. So everyone shows up at 7 and i meet this kid, josh, and omg. He was really hot. Like, damn. I just felt so attracted to him. So the party goes well and everyone leaves the next morning.

saturday: Wake up, kick everyone out, and head over to lees. get there at around 1 and we just sit there and hang out. My friend john calls me up to see if i wanted to go to his lake house for fireworks. I told him i was with lee, but he just invited lee as well. So we went to johns lake house. Got there and john and josh are there. I didnt expect him to be there. So we go out on the water and go tubing, which means that josh has to take his shirt off. bad news. i could not stop looking at him. like, i was careful about it and no one noticed.....except lee. I would look over at lee and just get these nasty looks. And i mean yeah, i should have been getting them. I definitely shouldnt have been staring. But you guys didnt see this kid. he was just so....perfect. and maybe i was attracted to the thought that he was untouchable. U know? idk. but i felt bad cause lee, my boyfriend, had to watch me go gaga over some perfect piece of boy. i know i wouldnt like it if he was staring at some cutie. but i just couldnt look away. So we had a fun day and the fireworks were nice. We said our goodbyes and me and lee went back to my house. I apologized like a thousand times, and he was giving me the "whatever i dont care" routine. i knew of corse it was bull shit. So we went to bed.

sunday(today): Woke up before lee and made him a piece of toast. Along with that piece of toast was a note that said "im sorry. i love u". I brought it to him and woke him up. One of the things i love about lee is how he wakes up. Ill shake him awake and he'll stretch all cute like a cat, then sit up, and just sit there for like 5 minutes. He wakes up and just isnt all there, u know? like it takes him a while to adjust to the land of the living. Plus i love his morning hair. So i wake him up and give him his toast, and hes just sitting there, hair a mess, eating his toast, and not saying anything. after he finally finishes his toast, he reads the note, he crawls out of bed, walks over to where im sitting and kisses me and says, "i love you too." then walks into the bathroom to take a shower.

And now, hes playing xbox and im on my comp.

so a lot of shit happened. sorry itook so long to update you guys. cute boys have been keeping me busy.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

well i did it

i got a twitter. i said to myself "why not?"

So those of u that have a twitter, follow me. im hilarious.

so yesterday i was really horny, so i called up lee. he came over and he ended up staying the night. Lets just say i rocked his world. it was my very first booty call :P

ok so thats it. keep on keepin' on

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

to tweet or not to tweet?

i keep on hearing great things about twitter. should i get one? would people follow? i dont want to invest in something that is just gonna be a waste of time.

those of u that have twitter, tell me about it. pros and cons. give me your sales pitch.

thanks boys(and girls?)

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

silly little fight

so me and lee got into a little fight on sunday. We were sitting watching tv and the daily show was on. Jon stewart was talking about gay rights and all that stuff. so we got to talking and lee was very much in support of the gay community and equal rights and all that. and i agreed with him about everything. Its just im not big on "fighting the good fight". Like all these gay people getting mad about a small comment or someone using the word fag in the wrong way. I just want to stay at home with my boyfriend and be happy. But lee thinks that since im gay, i should get mad when people make fun of gay people. But like, i feel like i should be the bigger person and just ignore all the childishness going on in the outside world. Some people just dont like gay people. i hope that makes sense.

Anyway, we were debating the whole thing and lee was getting pretty upset, so as he got up to leave the room he took my french fries and threw them in the garbage. i was furious. so i yelled "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!!?!" and he just kept walking.
Now ill admit, i over reacted a tad about the french fries. But i think he over reacted about the whole gay thing. I was calm while we were debating, he was getting heated.

So since he was at my house, the rest of his visit was a little tense. he wasnt about to apologize and neither was i. we were both just angry. We didnt even sleep in the same bed.

So when he left the next day, i didnt want to be the one to call and apologize first, but that changed. Tuesday i just coundnt do it anymore so i called. We talked. He apologized and i apologized. we both realized how stupid of a fight it was. i mean, it really was just a stupid argument. I shouldnt have gotten so mad about french fries. and lee should understand that we have different views.

So in other news my mom and dad keep asking when im gettin a girlfriend. Its always so awkward. So i think they might be leaning something about me pretty soon.

Friday, June 18, 2010

crazy party

So we all met up at aaron at around 10, because when we left the party we were all gonna crash at aarons. So we got there at 10 and just hung out for a while. We played ping pong and xbox. Aaron was being really nice to lee, which i liked. 1130 we leave for the party. Right when i get there i see people i know. Everyone just kept coming up and saying hi. I introduced lee as my friend from college. My shy little lee would just nod and say hi. adorable.

Out of the 6 of us, three of us knew everyone. Me, sam, and rob were very popular and were always busy with people. Sam more than anyone cause it was his bday. But aaron and john i felt kinda bad for because they didnt know as many people. They just talked in a corner. And lee just followed me around.

So we start drinking. We all get pretty drunk. Rob more than anyone. so its getting close to 1, which is when we all wanted to leave, and were saying our goodbyes and this one girl, sarah, who is drunk out of her mind, walks right up to lee. She blurts out, "are u gay?" and im just like fuck. And i look at lee and it must have been the alcohol but he goes "yep, i suck dick" and she laughs, a lot, and turns around and throws up all over this bush. So i grab lee and we get the hell out of there.

So the car ride consisted of john, our designated driver, playing loud music, while me, lee, aaron and rob sang along. it was fun.

So we get to aarons safe and sound, and we start playing beer pong. We played a few games, then we all sit down, and start watching a movie. This is the last thing i remember clearly. I remember rob and aaron running to the bathroom a few times. I remember i was sitting on the couch and lee was laying with his head in my lap. I remember running my hands through his long hair.(omg its sooo long now!) And thats it. Those are the last things i remember.

So i wake up the next day around 11. I was in aarons bed wearing nothing but my boxers. I was like wtf. So after like 2 minutes of waking up and trying to remember what happened, i notice that im not alone in the bed. Assuming its lee, i pull the blanket off of him. Well, it wasnt lee. It was aaron, and he was wearing nothing but his boxers. So at this point im just like wtf. So hes still passed out, so i quietly get out of bed and start looking for my shit. No where. So i leave aarons room and start looking in the basement. No where. So im like wtf. So i figure lee has to know, so i start looking for him. So im looking all through out the basement, the only place he could be. I find rob on the couch, and lee under the ping pong table wearing a shirt and boxers. So i crawl under and gently wake him up, and hes all disoriented. im like "babe, wear are my clothes?" and he looks at me and says "who cares, your hotter with them off" so i laugh and punch him in the arm. hes like "owwww i dont know! ask john" Perfect, ill find john and he'll have to know. He didnt drink as much. Well, i cant find john. And im like wtf. Then it hits me. There are people talking in the kitchen. Theyve been talking this whole time. So i go upstairs to the kitchen and sure enough, theres john talking to aarons mom and dad. Johns like "good morning" and aarons mom is like, "why are u in your boxers?" so im like, "i cant find my clothes" they all chuckle and aarons dad is like "i remember my first beer" and im like fuck this guy, i just want my clothes. So john says "i think i saw your shit in the bathroom. So i thank him and go back to the basement and find my shirt and shorts, lees shorts, and aarons shirt and shorts, all in the shower. Thank god they wernt wet. So i get dressed, throw a now sleeping lee his shorts, and go back to aarons room and throw his clothes on the bed. Then i went up and had breakfast with john and aarons parents.

People start waking up. Lee, rob, and eventually aaron. So we all finish breakfast and were sitting at the table and were all trying to figure out what happened. Everyone remembers sitting on the couch, but for everyone but john, we dont remember anything else. So we heres johns story.

We were all watching the movie when rob suggested we play another game of beer pong. We all agreed and it was me and lee vs. aaron and rob. So we set up and right before we play aaron complains about the heat so he takes off his shirt and shorts and is just in his boxers. Me and lee i guess agree so we strip down too. So we play a game and rob and lee are like, thats it im going to bed. Rob finds the couch, aaron turns on the tv, john joins rob on the couch, and lee goes to the bathroom. So then i went to aarons room were i fell asleep in his bed. thats when john fell asleep. So aaron must have gotten tired eventually and gone to his bed and didnt care i was there. And lee must have seen that the couch was full so he went and slept under the ping pong table.

We all had a good laugh. So then we all left at 2ish. Me and lee came here and fell asleep. didnt wake up till 7 and we ate dinner. hung out and lee left monday at 11.

So yeah thats it. I have some other stuff to talk about, including me and lee having our first fight, but i dont want to make this post any longer than it already is. So stay tuned.

Saturday, June 12, 2010

when lee meets aaron

So lee came over yesterday at around 3. We hung out for a bit until dinner when my mom offered to take us out. I at first was like no fucking way, but its free food, and she loves lee. So it was a pretty normal dinner. My mom, lee, me and my brother. It was nice.

So after dinner we hung out for a while. My friend john called me up and asked if we wanted to see a movie. We said sure and at 830 we met my friends john, sam, rob, and brian. I introduced them to lee and they all were very nice. Sam was like, "so this is the boyfriend huh?" and me and lee smiled. It was nice. And durring the movie we held hands for a while. very nice.

so then after the movie we got a call from aaron. He had just gotten home and he wanted to see us. So we all went to his house at around 1130. I introduced aaron to lee. Aaron was very very nice. And then all 7 of us just talked. Very nice. It was getting close to 1 and people started leaving and eventually it was just me, lee and aaron. We had some nice talks. Aaron asked a lot of question. Where we met, our first date. He was very interested. so we finally left around 130.

we got home and, how should i say it? we fucked. haha lee was very horny for some reason. So were done and were laying in my bed and he says "i love your friends. I dont think sam likes me and aaron is absolutely adorable." and i was like "haha yeah. they all liked u." i just didnt want to mention aaron right then.

So then this morning lee thought it would be a good idea to go get breakfast. So we got up way to early and went to breakfast. it was nice. this old woman and man kept looking at us. Lee thought it would be a good idea to surprise kiss me. So he did, and i of corse didnt stop him haha. The old people stopped looking after that.

so now hes napping and im on my comp. and in a few hours, were going to the party. I loved all of your comments and i think im just gonna introduce him as my friend. if people wanna ask, ill tell.

Friday, June 11, 2010

coming out?

A lot of shit has been going on.

So one of my good friends is having a huge birthday party tomorrow night. So i asked him if it would be cool if i brought someone. He was fine with it. So i called up lee and asked if he wanted to come. he'll be here today at 3.

So him coming means a lot of things. Hes definitely going to meet all of my friends. Im absolutely fine with that, because everyone knows about him now. Now this party is going to have a lot of people from high school there. So if lee comes, i have 2 options. Introduce him as a friend from high school, or introduce him as my boyfriend. Now ive thought a lot about this. If i introduce him as my friend, no worries. If i introduce him as my boyfriend, i feel like im just dropping a huge bomb. not only would i be coming out, but i would be introducing them to my boyfriend. Thats a lot to handle, especially coming from me, someone they thought was straight.

so im not sure what to do. I talked to lee about it and he says i can do whatever i want and he doesnt want to pressure me into coming out. so thats nice. but at the same time, i kinda want to come out. i have this amazing boyfriend and i want to show him off god damnit! haha.

so any suggestions? im very tied up right now.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010


Well not a lot of people asked questions. For those who did ask a question, i love u. For those who didnt, no worries. Im just in a really chill mood right now. I love u all no matter what.


Are you a cat or dog person?
Dog person. Definitely.

What's your favourite and least favourite season?
Spring. Not to hot and the flowers start to bloom. and i love the rain.

What's your favourite tv show?
Breaking bad. Just an amazingly well produced show. LOST is second. And dexter is up there.

What's your favourite colour?

What's your favourite food?
I love spaghetti. hot dogs are good two. i like to many foods

What's your favourite physical part of a guy?
im really attracted to legs. like if a guy has bad legs, i cant find him attractive. I love a bare back too.

Which of Lee's qualities do you most like and think makes you a good couple? (mentally)
I love how hes like, insecure and shy. I just find that adorable. It makes me want to just be his knight in shining armor. What makes us a good couple. Well it doesnt hurt that we are both attracted to eachother. We just click. We already know eachothers little quirks. Idk, its like hes one piece of a puzzle and im another piece and we just fit together. wow long answer

Is your blog name Daily Dan cos you jerk off daily? Or fuck, now that you have Lee. :P
Well at first it was gonna be that i would post everyday, so i would be daily dan. but that stopped.

Umm what's is Lee's father's most attractive body feature? lol
his hair. salt and pepper. like george clooney. yum.

Would you rather give or receive oral? And why? :P
thats hard. id say 50/50. I love sucking dick. It tastes good. but man do i love a good blow job.

Does Lee have good breath?
yes. like puppy breath.

Have you done anything kinky with him yet? Would you want to? O:
havent done anything. im not really into the kinky stuff.

Does he take his shoes and socks off when you have funtimes?
i make sure of it. To me, your not really having sex unless your both completely naked. and i love legs and feet

Who'd make a better Prime Minister of Aus? Kevin Rudd, Bert Newton or Tony Abbot? :D Feel free to take them on name value. :P
kevin rudd, because he has the same last name as paul rudd

Where do your eyes go in the locker room?
chest and ass, legs, then face

Annnndd will you marry me?
in a heart beat

Have you and Lee swapped roles in the bedroom?
not yet. hes still the bottom. maybe we will one day. i know aj wants me to.

Which country do you most want to visit?
pretty much anywhere in europe except russia. i dont care to much for russia.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

If you had the power to domesticate any animal on this earth, that is now considered wild, which one would you .... for 1 week only...
lion. Just a big cat that loves u.

when you're intimate with a bf, do you need to see his eyes, to be fulfilled??
not the whole time. maybe when u climax. guess it depends on the mood.

If you were given $100,000 to spend, only, not on yourself, how would you spend it??
idk. my family. friends who need help. hard question.

If you found a roll of cash (or, a pocketbook with money) on the ground, in a store parking lot, and nobody saw you pick it up... what would you do with it??
id like to say id take to wallet in and leave the money. But being realistic, id probably take the money and return the wallet. im a bad person.

If you decide to get married to Lee, where would you like to have the ceremony?
Id marry lee anywhere. but id love to do it somewhere on a beach i guess.

Favorite all time movie?
The shawshank redemption

Do you have a major picked out yet, and if so what?
I dont have a major picked out yet. idk what i want to do.

Would you ever think about going into politics?
i would love to be president. and id be good because im not retarded

dick size?

ur bf dick size?

do you swallow? does he? do you lyk it?
i have. it was.....ok. He did....he seemed to like it better.

most wildest place you will/want/had sex at?
nowhere really. id love to do it outside sometime.

bb or condom?

favorite date? dream date?
First date with lee was great. i dont really have a dream date.

if you could be some1 famous for a day, who?
someone who is famous for doing something good.

half full or half empty?
half full

Can you explain to us just how perfect your dick is? lol
pretty perfect

what is your favorite part of having a boyfriend?
just that connection u share with another person. The feeling i get deep down that makes me feel better about things. to love someone so much, u cant keep it in. its great

ok well thats it. i have a lot of new shit to talk about so expect a post pretty soon after this. hope u enjoy.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Any questions?

well im not sure what to do. I cant think of anything to post. Like, i want to post something, and i feel i have something to post, but i have no idea what. My last few posts have been pretty bland. I dont want to keep gushing about lee. I need something to post.

So, in order to fix this, i am gonna let u guys ask me any question you want. You can ask about lee, my parents, anything u want. I know, mirrorboy just did it. But a lots happened since the last time i did this. College, boyfriend, all that stuff.

So ill give you guys a few days. idk maybe next wednesday.


Wednesday, June 2, 2010

back from lees

So i got back from lee's yesterday. Had an amazing time.

I was gonna leave here at 10 but my mom was being extra bitchy and i had to do some chores. Didnt end up leaving till closer to 12. When i got to lees his dad answered the door. He seemed pretty happy to see me. He called for lee who came from his room. He ran over to me and kissed me hello. It was very unexpected and i didnt know what to do, cause his dad was right there. So then we went to lees bedroom and his dad went to the kitchen. I was like "what was that about?" and he was like "what?" so i was like "kissing in front of your dad" and he said "oh. fuck him" haha i love it. So we hung out for a while until around 5 when his block party was starting, so me lee and his parents went off to the park. Memorial day is a big deal where lee lives. His neighbors went all out. Hotdogs, hamburgers, all different pies. it was nuts. there was a bunch of people. So we got food and went and sat at bench. we ate alone for a while, until 3 guys started coming over. They were lees friends. So they came over and lee introduced me as his boyfriend. They were all very nice, and a lot like lee. So we ended up hanging with them for the rest of the night. We all went out and they showed me their town, which was very nice. After we were out till like 1, lee and i went home and passed out. I woke up at 10 and lee was gone so i headed down to the kitchen where lee and his mom and dad were sitting. Lees mom made me some coffee, and we sat there and talked for a while. Then i packed and left.

it was a wonderful visit. we didnt even have sex. it was just nice to be with my boy.

At this point, hes all i think about. i just find him so sexy. he growing his hair out and i love it. im just to in love. life has never been this good.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

cant think of a title. fuck

man o man have i been busy. Sometimes having a lot of friends can be very draining.

A few days ago i was driving one of my friends home and he asked me about me being gay. Its the first time ive really talked to any of my friends about it(besides aaron). He asked if anyone else knew i was gay. I said nope. Then he asked why i wasnt out trying to find a boyfriend. So i was like "well, actually, i have a boyfriend." And thus started the conversation about lee. I just told him pretty basic things. He seemed happy for me, so it worked out.

Had a bit of a party with all my friends 2 nights ago. Its the first time everyone was back in town. Everyone got pretty drunk. Nothing big happened. Just a great night hanging with friends. I did wake up on the ground in some closet. Pretty nuts.

for some strange reason, every single boy i see i find cute as hell. Like, i would usually see maybe 3-5 cute guys a day. But now, its passing 10. Its like now that im taken, all i see is these boys i cant have, and thus making them more attractive. its weird. Also, since i started dating lee, i feel Like ill be at the mall and ill just feel 100% gay. And i mean, i am. But i always felt pretty straight, except i wanted to fuck dudes. but now, i just feel like im all gay, and everyone knows. idk if that makes any sense.

And in closing, im off to lees tomorrow. Probably leave at 10. I guess his block is having a memorial day party and were gonna go. Lee says i get to meet his friends. Should be fun.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010


aaron comes home this weekend. i havent seen him in just about 3 weeks. I hate it. Why did he have to get a job at his school? he should be home with me. but at the same time its probably best.

im going to lee's on monday. gonna spend the day there. maybe stay the night. who knows.

well just a quick update. sorry about being so busy. love u guys.

Friday, May 21, 2010


sorry for my recent disappearance. ive just been extremely busy. Ill wake up in the morning andsee a list of shit my parents want me to do, like mow the lawn or wash the floor. Since i dont have a job they basically treat me like their slave. but im happy to do it, cause i get anything i want. then when im done doing chores, some random friend will text me and be like lets hang out. People i havent seen since highschool. its nuts. and i cant say no. gotta keep my reputation up. So ill be out till like 2 in the morning and then the same thing the next day.

But finally i have some free time.

weekend with lee
Was an amazing weekend. he came over friday around 1. we hung out, did some stuff, and then when my parents came home they took us out to dinner. Dinner was nice. my mom and dad asked lee a lot of questions. Lee was surprisingly open about shit. Normally hes kinda shy and stuff but not with my parents. My mom has a way of making everyone feel welcome, so that might have done it. So the rest of friday saturday and sunday we just sat around and watched movies and stuff. We didnt really leave the house. it was wonderful just being with him. He left sunday at noon. Really nothing eventful. I just had a really good time.

anyway, sorry again about making u wait for the update. heres a picture of me.

haha just kidding. thats not me. But when i saw this picture i was like," i dont remember taking this picture." me and this kid look very much alike.

Sunday, May 16, 2010


"I love you, dont you see
you stole my heart and 1 2 3
I love you, yes its true
you stole my heart and im gonna steal yours too."

AHAHHAHAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Im so fucking in love. my heart just feels huge!!!

-Dan (head over heels in love)

Friday, May 14, 2010

lee's here!

i should have posted this earlier but i was busy getting ready. Lee's here, got here around 1. Weve been having fun haha. hes playing xbox now so i have to be quick.

I told my parents a friend from school was visiting for the weekend. just a friend. lees fine with it. we just have to be more quiet. when lee leaves sunday, maybe ill tell them. idk yet.

i havent told my friends anything because, well, just about all my friends are on vacation or busy. Aaron is working at his school, 3 of my friends are on vacation, and the rest are here and there. if i see them, I probably wont tell them were dating, just that were friends. They will probably figure it out tho.

ok gotta run

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

flirting with boys

I was at the store returning some shit for my mom, and the dude working there was really cute, and he was totally flirting with me. I was sure he was gonna ask me out. then at blockbuster, some guy who worked there who was really fucking cute, came up to me and asked if i needed anything. I said no but he just started talking to me about other shit that had nothing to do with movies. He was totally flirting. And i just keep thinking, is there like some scent im giving off to all these gay guys that lets them know im gay? why hasnt this happened before? well it sure is nice to know people think im cute.

my ego is too big

also, been talking to lee. looks like hes coming over this weekend. He wants to come friday and leave sunday. Im all for it. But, 2 things. 1: i havent told my parents yet. Ive been thinking a lot about just telling them. Being like, my friend from school is coming to visit for the weekend, and weve kinda idk, thoughts? and 2: my friends dont know, and lee wants to meet them. i have no idea how im suppose to drop that bomb. Like, just telling them my friend is visiting and then being like "were actually dating" idk. help?

so yeah, any advise would be much appreciated. u guys rock. ill be on msn today at some point so we should all talk or somethin. idk. im in a wacky mood.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

wonderful time at lee's

Lee's was really fun

Left home around 10 and got to lees close to 1030. It was just him home because his parents were still at work. We had the house to ourselves and we fooled around for a while. it was fun. he has a nice house and the most comfortable bed. We hung out for a while and his mom came home around 4. We met and she gave me a hug and was really nice. like, she was just a really sweet person. She asked me a lot of questions. Around 530 is when lee's dad came home. I was pretty nervous to meet him. Lee was like "Dad, this is my boyfriend Dan." and i was like o shit. So he extended his hand and i shook it. He was ok. So lee's mom ordered a pizza and we all sat and talked. Lee's dad also asked me a lot of questions and one of them was "did u play any sports in highschool?" so i was like "yeah i played football. I was a reciever". right after i said that his eyes lit up and he like turned into a different person. He was awesome after that. We talked about football and stuff. lee told me later that he was never into sports and his dad was treating me like the son he never had. kinda sucks, but lee didnt care. him and his dad have i guess a strained relationship. Anyway dinner was done and lee and i went on a walk for a bit. We went to park and sat on a bench and just enjoyed being with the other person. We came back and watched Se7en, one of my favorite movies. It was getting kinda late so we went to his room. We started making out and it was getting pretty intense. while we were fooling around, lee was like "i want u to fuck me" so he grabbed a condom and, yeah, we had sex. It was both of ours first time. It was amazing. and lee loved it. Anyway, after that, lee fell asleep but i couldnt, so i got up and talked to matt for a while. he kinda helped me put things into perspective, and i felt a lot better about things. So i went back to bed with lee.

We woke up around 10 and went downstairs where his mom was making breakfast and his dad was reading the paper. We sat down and lee's mom was like "good morning you two. sleep well?" and me and lee were like yup. and lees dad was like "you two sure made a lot of noise last night" and me and lee were like, fuck. im sure we were beat red in the face. Breakfast was good and i left after that. got home around 12.

over all id say it was a great weekend. i feel good about me and lee. and im pretty sure his parents liked me. lee said they did so yeah.

anyway, thats my trip. later.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

going to lee's!

so it looks like im going to lee's tomorrow. He was gonna come here but i guess his dad found out and didnt want lee coming to visit some boy without meeting him first. I guess he isnt as cool about the whole boyfriend thing as his mom. So im going to him! ill be there most of tomorrow, and then be home on friday which is when aaron comes home. So yeah....

....about aaron. I just, i feel like with me and lee, its awesome and i love lee a lot and hes a great boyfriend and all, but i just still feel so connected to aaron. its like, ugh. its hard to explain. Like it feels like lee is much more emotionally invested in me than i am in him because of the whole aaron thing. like, i hold aaron so fucking high, its hard for anyone to like, compare to him. make sense?

I think i should talk to aaron about the whole thing. and lee. idk any thoughts?

And should i get a twitter? would people follow?

Sunday, May 2, 2010

someones got BIEBER FEVER!!!

so yeah, i admit it, i think justin bieber is adorable. I dont care for his music, but holy shit hes cute. Here are some pictures.

He might as well be suckin my dick

Toooooooo fucking cute

I like to think theres nothing under the towel

He can toss around the football with me any day

Just standing there looking sexy. yum

OOOOO some cute bieber butt!

Last but not least, Justins extremely cute feet

So yeah, just some pics of justin for ya. in other news, i really miss lee. he said he was gonna try to come over sometime soon, so im hopeful. I also lost my ipod, and im pissed about it.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

im home

so i got home thursday. put all my shit in my room and was gonna put everything back but, its still in a huge pile. ive just been lazy. Lee got home yesterday.

Interesting thing tho. Thursday when we were saying goodbye, he told me that he told his mom about me. And like, i wasnt mad or anything, but idk it was just like....idk. He was like "i was talking to my mom and she asked if i had met someone, and i kinda told her about u." So i was like " what did she say?" and he just went on about how she was happy for him and i guess lee told her everything. like EVERYTHING. and at first i was like, nervous, but now its kinda a freeing feeling. like, lees mom knows, u know?

idk if any of that makes sense. im kinda being rushed by my mom to go shopping for nice clothes.

one more thing. Do u guys like hearing about me and lee? if u guys are sick of hearing about it then i can stop. its just this blog is about my life, and lee is in my life so yeah. just let me know. sorry if this post is weird. ive got a lot on my mind.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

im comin home

I know i said i would be absent for a while but finals are just about done and i get to go home tomorrow. im excited to be done with everything.

Havent seen much of Lee lately. hes a much bigger nerd than i am, and he studies a lot. its adorable. We have definitely fallen into the boyfriend groove. The expected goodnight text. The expected goodbye kiss. We know where to touch eachothers body to give them pleasure(Lee loves it when i kiss the back of his neck). Everything is just going well.

But, and its a HUGE but. Ive been thinking about aaron A LOT. like, hes sometimes all i think about. and im scared shitless. i really dont like it. Ive talked to lee about it and he says he understands but i can tell he doesnt really like it. Aaron doesnt know about lee, but id like him to meet him.

Idk. maybe its the school year ending thats got me all in a weird mood. Who knows.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

busy busy

sorry for my disappearance. Ive just been so fucking busy. Schools coming to an end and i have finals this coming week. And lee, boy he keeps me busy haha.

So i just wanted to let u guys know i probably wont be posting for a while. Maybe when i get home from college. I just dont know.

Lee is wonderful. Weve been on another date. We went to lunch at wendys haha. it was awesome because he kissed me inside where everyone could see us. it was pretty hot. No sex yet, but blowjobs for sure. Amazing stuff there.

And lately, before i fall asleep, ill just think about aaron and tyler a lot. Like, i think about them sexually. I really miss aaron and i just want to kiss him everywhere. and tyler, i just want to fuck him so bad. idk its weird.

well ill talk to u when i talk to u.

Monday, April 19, 2010

best day ever?

So today was like, the best day ever.

Went to media class and lee was waiting with a huge grin on his face.

lee: "hey there'
me: "hey. whats up?"
lee: "just waiting for u. ready for tonight?"
me: "whats tonight?"
lee: "our first date! i thought i told u..."
me: "um... right..."
lee: "haha maybe i didnt. "

so we walk inside and sit, and lee is sooo excited, and its rubbing off on me, and we're just both really excited. And we talk all class, like old times. it was just wonderful. we were making fun of people and joking around. It was so awesome. So class ends and we walk out and he wants to go to his house before we go out. So we get to his room and we drop our bags and he comes over and gives me a quick kiss and says "im so excited for this" and im like "me too". so he backs off and heads over to his dresser and pulls out a clean shirt. He pulls off the shirt hes wearing and throws it in his clothes basket. Let me just say, my mouth was watering. His back was to me, so i only saw his back, but omg that was enough to send me over the edge. He puts his clean shirt on and turns around and i must have been smiling or something because he was like "what?" i just said "nothin"

So we left his room and went to my car. I asked him where we were going and he said chilis. i love chilis. So we head out and i put on some music, and its my favorite song ever, it was a good day by ice cube. And to my surprise, lee knew most of the words. So there we were, on the way to chilis, singing it was a good day. it was like out of a movie.

So we get to chilis, and we get this nice booth. We sit and order our food, and we start talking. It was so natural, just us there talking and eating our food. It was such a great date. We played footsies every now and again. He even payed for me. It was so nice. And the food was amazing. I had the cajun chicken pasta and he had the chicken strips, and we shared a cheesecake. It was so nice.

So we head back to his place, and we walk in and sit on his couch and put in a movie. Shawn of the dead haha. so we cuddle up next to eachother and start watching. I remember his hair, and how it smelled like watermelon. It was so good, so i start to run my hand through it. it was just so peaceful. So we watch the movie, and it ends, and were just sitting there. So i lean over and kiss his cheek. He turned toward me and he kisses me. so we start kissing for a while. After a few minutes he ends up on top of me and were just really kissing hard. I remember my hand going under his shirt and running against his smooth back. Man it was hot. We do that for a while until my phone starts ringing. It was my room mate wondering where i was. So our moment was kinda cut short. I told him i needed to get going cause i have a somewhat early class, so we kiss one last time and i get my stuff and go.

So yeah, just about the best day ever i think.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

we need a date night

So my birthday was pretty awesome. Got tons of money and some other cool shit. It was overall a great day. Before i left for home on thursday i got part 1 of lees gift. We met for lunch and he came over to my place for the first time. So we just made out for half an hour before he had to go to class. He also bought me recess peanut butter cups. It was possibly the best gift ever.

But like, it still feels awkward. The whole time durring lunch it was just kinda like, different. Its hard to explain. Like, i dont really see him as my boyfriend yet. And like, when we were kissing, it was great, but when we were just talking....idk. i think we need to go on a date for me to really start to feel like hes my boyfriend. so idk.

having relationships are kinda hard.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

way too soon

So yeah i didnt ask him to come home with me this weekend. I just feel like its way way to soon.
And in class today, things were weird. It was just kinda awkward. Idk, maybe its in my head.

I did get some info out of him today, and since u guys asked, heres the answers.

hes never had a boyfriend.
hes out to his parents and a few friends
hes never kissed a boy(until now)

yeah so thats the big stuff. idk i feel like this is a pointless post. i feel old too.

happy birth day to me.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

help with this weekend

First i want to thank everyone for their comments about my grandpa. Im gonna miss him, but life goes on. And thanks for all the encouraging words about lee. You guys really are the best.

So didnt see lee at all yesterday. I had a paper to write and idk it just didnt happen. We texted for a while but you know, i would have loved to have tasted his lips again. its like cocaine. i want it all the time.

Anyway, we talked about this weekend and i told him i was going home for the weekend cause of my birthday and all. He was fine with it. He just told me he would have to give the first part of my present on thursday and the second part on monday. Who knows what that means...

So heres my problem. I was thinking of asking if he wanted to come with me, cause he isnt really doing anything this weekend and well, i wanna be with him on my bday. But i mean, idk. Do u guys think its too soon? I keep feeling like its way too soon to have him come home with me. Idk. its not like id introduce him to my parents as my boyfriend or anything. For now i would just say hes a friend. But like, i feel like its way too soon. we literally just decided to be boyfriends on monday. We havent even been out on a date yet. And if he did come home with me, would he come out to dinner with me and my family for my bday? i just dont know.

Any help would be much appreciated. Love u guys! your all the best.

Monday, April 12, 2010


Well before i go on and tell u about what happened with lee, i just wanted to let u know about my sunday. I spent 10 hours in the hospital, where eventually my grandpa died. I didnt get home till around 1 in the morning. And im pretty ok with the whole death thing, it doesnt bother me. But what really got to me was my grandma. Hearing her cry was horrible. And my mom was crying. it was just a bad atmosphere.

Anyway, on to the good news.

It was a beautiful day outside. So I got to media class and lee wasnt there waiting. I just figured he was running late. Get into class and sit down. No lee. i wait and wait and wait till class is just about to start. FINALLY he comes over and sits next to me. so we start talking.

me: "there u are"
lee: "yeah i was napping"
me: "tired?"
lee: "yeah i didnt sleep well last night"
me: "u ok?"
lee: "im fine"
me: "ok...."

So the rest of class was pretty bad. We didnt really talk much, and it felt kinda awkward. It was just bad. So finally, class ends and we get up in silence. We make our way outside and we start talking again.

me: "u ok?"
lee: "im fine. listen, can we talk?"
me: "yeah, right now?"
lee: "yeah, lets go to the pond"
me: "ok sure"

so we start making our way to the pond, which is really far from class. It was a bad walk. Not a word was spoken. I wanted to say something, but i was just so nervous about everything. So after maybe 10 minutes we get to the pond and lee leads me to one of those 4 seated table bench things. He sits and i sit across from him. So lees looking at the table and im just sitting there, not sure what to do. So maybe like 3 minutes later, lee starts speaking.

lee: "About the other day. Listen, if you were just joking around i understand and all. its no big deal"
me: "what?"
lee: "the whole u liking me and all. i understand if you were just joking around and shit.
(his eyes are still glued to the table)
me: "wait, you think i was joking?"
lee: "yeah dude its cool. people joke like that all the time"
me: "well i wasnt joking...."
(he looks up for a quick second and sees me smiling. he thought i was still joking around)
lee: "dude, really. the jokes over"
me: "what joke?"
lee: "seriously. stop it."

I was just in like shock. I had just told this boy that i liked him 2 days ago, and he didnt believe it. He just didnt think i was serious. So, i decided to get bold. I got up, alked over to his seat, and sat down right next to him. He noticed and looked at me. He looked sad. So i grab one of his hands, and lean forward. He meets me half way, and we kiss. It was a short kiss, and the minute we pulled apart his cheeks were blushed and he had this huge smile was on his face. I felt myself smiling just as hard.

lee: "y-you were serious?"
me: "i told u i was"
lee: "haha yeah. i guess so."
(he looks away and bites his bottom lip. Thats one of my weaknesses. i cant keep it in)

I lean forward again, and we start kissing more and more. I feel his tongue touching mine. My hand makes its way to his hair, and i feel his hand on my thigh. It felt like i was floating. It felt like we were kissing for hours, but after maybe 10 minutes we heard some girls laughing. We stopped quickly and we were both beat red.

me: "wanna get some dinner?"
lee: "um.....yea....."
me: "ok haha"

So we went to dinner, ate dinner, and went back to his dorm room. We talked for a long time. We talked about us, about this weekend, about music and food and movies we like. And we kissed some more haha. and finally at around 9 i said i had to go. So he walked me to his door and kissed me goodbye. No ones ever kissed me goodbye before.

So all in all, i would say it was the best day ever. Looks like Daily Dan has himself a boyfriend.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

mission accomplished

ok so heres the story

i was home last night talking to matt. I was kinda feeling down about college and shit, and i was like maybe i should text lee. So i did, and for a good while me and lee were texting back and forth, and matt was helping me figure out what to say.

me "what are you up to?"
lee "watching finding nemo"
me "I love that movie. wish i was there"
lee "wish u were here too. What are u up to?"
me "just thinking about shit and watching shrek 2"
lee "what shit?"
me "Just some shit ive got on my mind"
lee "are u ok?"
me "o yeah im fine its just shit u know?"
lee "wanna talk about it?"
me "well i just met this person and i think im starting to really like them..."
lee "more than friends?"
me "more than friends....."
lee "Actually, theres this person i just met and i think im starting to really like them..."
me "more than friends?"
lee "more than friends...."
me "i like you lee"
lee "i like you dan"
me "wanna get together on monday?"
lee "yea we can talk about stuff ;)"
me "cant wait :)"
lee "me either..."

and that was it. You have no idea how this feels. its like my body is cold and my heart is releasing warm chicken noodle soup all throughout my body haha. I feel so good. I cant put it into words correctly.

its too late. lee has my heart.

(p.s. thanks matt for your help.)

Thursday, April 8, 2010

what should i do?

Ok well yesterday was a shitty day. it was raining on and off and by the time i got to media i was pretty wet. But Lee was waiting again. I wonder if he gets there early just for me. We actually had to kinda pay attention in class cause the professor was talking about our final paper. So class kinda sucked, but after class i asked lee if he wanted to join me and my friends for some dinner, and he said of corse. So we ate for like 45 minutes and as we were leaving Lee asked me if i wanted to go on a walk. Of corse, i said yes. I was kinda nervous, not sure why. So we said bye to my friends, who i m sure thought it was weird. So we went walking. We were walking around campus, talking about high school and how green the grass was and a bunch of other shit. It just felt so.....right. But after a while of walking and talking, it started to rain cats and dogs. So we ran under this building overhang and waited for the rain to stop, which was like 15 mins later. Then we said goodbye and we went back to our dorms. It was really really nice.

So now heres my question. How do i get things moving? How to i take it to the next level?
I was talking to Matt and he said i should ask him to like the movies or dinner, and when he says yes, if he says yes, let him know its a date. I kinda like that.

any other ideas? I really like Lee, and i dont wanna mess things up.

And one more thing. I had a really weird dream last night. I was with Lee in my bed and we were like cuddling and then the door bursts open and Arran storms in and starts yelling "your suppose to love ME! your suppose to love ME!" Then i woke up. What does that mean?